Anchors Away!! Pt. 14

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For the next few days, it was almost like the instructions on the back of a shampoo bottle… Wash, Rinse, Repeat. But in our case, it was enter the lock, wait for the water to raise or lower, exit the lock and travel to the next one and repeat the process.

Nothing really changed much in our nighttime activities other than Ann and I were finding excuses to leave Max and Bob alone together, as much as possible. I had explained to Ann that Bob and Max were having “feelings” for each other, and that I wanted to give them ample opportunity to explore those feelings and decide where they wanted their relationship to go from here.

Even though neither one of has said anything yet, I can feel my relationship with Ann is growing day by day. The more time that we spend together…the more our relationship seems to grow. It may never go beyond just “fuck buddies” as Bob would put it and if that is as far as it goes…I am good with it. But I feel like something much deeper and more permanent is simmering just below the surface…and if it is, then I am ready for that too!

Granted, After the horrible mess that I went through with my soon to be, ex-wife and being told on a daily basis what a vile and despicable waste of human flesh that I am. I am still a bit skittish when it comes to thinking about long term relationships.

But the wonderful women that I have shared this journey with…have all proven to me that not all women are like that!

Because of women like her…I now know why a lot of men die before their wives…they simply get tired of all the bitching and complaining and just give up and die…just to get away from it!

If I had not decided to embark on this journey…and knew that I was going to have to face another 20+ years of the same shit that I had endured for the previous 20 years …I have absolutely no doubt that within 5 years, I would have just swallowed a shotgun barrel and pulled the trigger. As much as it hurts me to say that!

But all of that is behind me now, and I am finally living life the way that I want to live it… and I am finding out that I actually like myself again!

We made it to the Lockport Locks too late to go through this evening. Best to moor for the night and strike out fresh in the morning.

We all decide that we need to feel solid ground beneath our feet…so we strike out at a leisurely stroll and come upon an artisan Ice Cream Shop called “Lake Effect Ice cream.” Which in Ann and Bob’s words “Was to die for!”

I have to admit…I am normally just a plain Vanilla or Chocolate kind of guy… just do not care to mess with anything other than the classics. But this place made a convert out of me…

Bob and Ann talked me into trying something called a “Peanut Butter Epiphany” which consisted of peanut butter ice cream… with hot chocolate sauce, whipped cream with caramel sauce drizzled on top of that…then they added crushed peanut brittle, miniature peanut butter cups and a drizzle of peanut butter sauce. Oh my god…it was so good, and so rich and so fattening… what was there NOT to love about it!

Bob went with a “Chocolate Smores” which was frozen hot chocolate flavored Ice cream…with toasted marshmallows, chocolate covered graham cracker pieces drizzled with Chocolate syrup and marshmallow syrup.

I honestly do not know what Ann and Max had…as I was too involved with eating mine…to pay attention to what they were having.

We all finish our ice cream and discover that a “Paranormal Walk” is about to start out front….so we quickly purchase tickets and join the group. Certainly, a very entertaining and informative walking tour. Have no idea how much of it was “gospel truth” and how much of It was just “made up” for the tour….but it was a fun way to walk off a few of the calories from the ice cream…and learn a bit about the area.

On our way back to the boats, we were going to take the “underground boat tour” which takes you through the tunnels of the old locks…but they were closing and were not selling tickets for any more tours for today.

However, the “Niagara Zipper” zip line ride was still open and against my better judgement, I agreed to take a ride… if everyone else did. Secretly hoping to call their bluff. Unfortunately, they called mine.

You would think that a man of my age…would know better than to do something like this. But here I am…being strapped into a combination harness and torture device, being suspended from a cable stretched 85 feet above the ground….which will haul my screaming old ass….across the canal at 40 fucking miles an hour….then turn me around and send me right back….piss-stained pants and all. Well, it wasn’t QUITE that bad…but damn close! At least I can say that I have done it now…and won’t ever have to do something that foolhardy ever again!

Max rode it over and back…no big deal…you would have thought that he was simply riding the bus to work and back.

Ann went next and bonus veren siteler she was just like me…hanging on for dear life….cursing the rest of us for making her do it…the whole way over and the whole way back.

Bob did her best to make us all think that it was a piece of cake for her… and she did a pretty good job of it….right up until they pushed her off of the platform…sending her sailing across the canal. Pretty sure it was her screaming at the top of her lungs… “FUCK…oh fuckohfuckoh fuck” that gave away just how afraid of heights that she actually is.

We returned to the boats after that. We were all very tired and decided to just go on to bed. So that we can get an early start in the morning. As per our usual sleeping arrangement I was on the port side of the bed with Ann beside me, Bob beside Ann, and Max beside Bob on the starboard side. We all laid there for a bit cuddled up next to each other…until we all drifted off to sleep.

Along about 2 in the morning…we were awakened by a blood curdling scream! I jumped out of bed…bare ass naked, grabbed a souvenir 12-inch KC Royals baseball bat that I keep hanging on the wall…and went to the hatch door to unlatch it and investigate.

I stealth-fully open the latch and slowly open the hatch door. Not seeing anything, or anyone…I creep up the steps to look around. Doesn’t appear to be anyone around either of the boats… so I turn around and start to go back down the steps…then suddenly I hear the scream again….this time, it sounds VERY close!

At this point, I have serious doubts that this tiny little baseball bat…is going to be any match for the axe murderer that I am absolutely sure… is hiding in the shadows, just waiting to chop my dumb ass into little pieces.

As I start down the stairs…I am met by Max, Bob and Ann all carrying the biggest carving knives they can find in the galley. Bob hands me the “onion chopping” knife and as a unit….we go back up the stairs, ready to do battle with whoever, or whatever is out there!

That’s the bad part of doing ghost tours and paranormal tours… they put all manner of ideas in your head…that normally would not be there!

Here we are, the four of us…naked as the day we were born walking around outside…near a business section of town…each of us carrying knives, while looking for a “boogie man” that we can hear… but cannot find.

This is exactly how we are…when the VERY bright spotlight hits us… from the POLICE PATROL CAR!

Lucky that the officers that found us…had a good sense of humor! “Let me guess” one officer says ” You heard someone scream and came out, armed and dangerous to look for the culprit?


“Uh, yessir that is exactly what happened!” I say

“Charlie, go grab that sack out of the squad…let’s see if we can flush this bad guy out for these people”

The other officer retrieved a fast-food sack that still had French fries in it. The officer poured the fries out on the ground…in a small clearing near some bushes…then walked back to us.

While the one officer shines his flashlight in that direction…we suddenly see a pair of eyes peering back at us, in the bushes.

“It’s alright Red…come get your treat” the officer says as a beautiful red fox walks out of the bushes and begins to eat the French fries.

“We normally bring him a snack every night when we make our rounds. We are running late tonight…so he gets impatient and screams…scaring the hell out of people docked on the canal. Just like he did with you! He is totally harmless! Got too many coyotes out in the country…so foxes like him have migrated into the urban areas…and rely on finding scraps of human food to survive. We’re not supposed to encourage that kind of behavior…but neither one of us can stand to see an animal starve or suffer. So, we do a bit of dumpster diving at the fast-food joints …and spread the wealth to different animals we know that live around town. Now, you should all get back on board your boats before we get a call about a gang of naked people running around near the locks.”

“Thank you, officers!” We all say as we try to cover up as much of our naughty bits as possible.

Once back below deck, I latch the hatch door and say ” A FOX! A fucking FOX! Had no clue that they could make a noise like that….guess now we know!

We all put away our weapons, each taking their turn in the head… before crawling back in bed. Unfortunately, after our bit of excitement…we are all far too keyed up to go back to sleep.

So, we lay there and chit chat for a bit. Until Bob says “Fuck it” we need to do something to help take the edge off…so that we can all go back to sleep. I’m too fucking tired for an all-out orgy…but way too wound up to be able to relax and go to sleep.”

“Y’all ever try doing a daisy chain” Max asks

“Suppose this is something else you saw in a porno” Bob teases

“Nope, pretty bedava bahis sure it was a mainstream movie from the 1960’s…think it had something to do with hippies or something. Anyway, they did this huge daisy chain thing…and I remember wearing blisters on my dick from jacking off while remembering that scene. Looked like a lot of fun at the time.”

“So, how do we set this up” Ann asks “Girl, Girl, Boy, Boy” or what” she said with a smirk

“Yeah, sure” Max says before he thinks about what she has just said… “NO, WAIT! Girl, Boy, Girl, Boy!

“I still like my way better” Ann says as she gives Bob a big wink.

“Oh, I definitely like Ann’s Idea better” chimes in Bob

“What do you think Rick?” Ann asks

“If it will let me get back to sleep sooner… I’d suck a dick!”

“No Shit!” exclaims Max “You would actually go through with something like that?”

“I’ve done it before! Not necessarily proud of the fact…but certainly not ashamed of it either! Just another way to have some fun!”

“Well, I won’t say that I will NEVER suck a dick…but I have never had to and don’t intent to…if I can avoid it. So, it’s either boy, girl, boy, girl or masturbate your own self to sleep… that is my final offer!”

Without another word… Bob lays down across the head of the bed. Ann Lays across the bottom….I lay down face to crotch with Bob, Max lays down face to crotch with Ann. Max and I both start licking pussy at about the same time as the girls put our dicks in their mouths and complete “the chain.”

I have to admit that this is kind of fun and relaxing….but it’s also very difficult to concentrate on what you are doing….kind of the same way as 69 position. Really difficult to “give” and “receive” at the same time.

But we all manage to muster our way through it…and give each other some pretty decent orgasms before we have to call a truce, so we can get some sleep before the sun comes up!

We all sleep in a little longer than we had planned to… but we are close enough to the end of the canal at Buffalo that we can easily make it the rest of the way before the locks close for the night.

As luck would have it…once we are ready to go….we pull up to the blue line and see that the gates are already open… so we are able to go right on in and get our boats into position and ropes looped through the guide wires. We are pretty lucky at these locks…they are in pretty good shape. Some locks we have passed through had smooth concrete sides….some had heavy steel plates… but there were a few that were in bad need of some repairs…some of the concrete had weathered severely and chunks had fallen from the walls… leaving the rough aggregate inside exposed…like a giant rasp…just waiting for a boat to get too close…so that it could take off big chunks of wood or fiberglass…just like a cheese grater.

It was for situations such as those…that I had bought very large round bumpers or “Fenders” as most people call them. I’ve always called them “Bumpers” because when my dad had his boat…he would leave his hanging over the side of the boat…while it was on a trailer in the barn. I was just tall enough that I would “BUMP” my head on them…every time I tried to squeeze past the boat. Been calling them bumpers ever since.

When I bought them…the marine store counter guy had laughed at me…said “Why in the world would you want to carry something THAT big with you… most people around here use the long cylindrical kind.”

Well, If I had listened to him…my boat would have been scratched and beat all to hell by now! That long cylindrical kind would have compressed too easily and left us far too close to the walls of the locks. We aren’t trying to protect the boat from rubbing against the edge of a dock in calm waters like we would, back in Missouri. We are up here, playing with the “big dogs”… these locks don’t just rub…they GRIND… if you don’t pay attention and let your boat get too close to the wall…you WILL pay for your inattention, one way or another!

We did good with the “Shuffling off to Buffalo”….everything was still pretty straight forward as far as the canal goes.

“Just go until you reach the Niagara River then go left on it…” everyone said.

Well, the problem with that is…that the Erie Canal makes a sweeping right hand turn toward Tonawanda Island and that’s it…you are suddenly on the Niagara, and it is kind of hard to tell if this is where we need to turn left…or is it further up ahead?

So, we keep going the way we are pointed and find ourselves smack dab in the middle of the NIAGARA RIVER YACHT CLUB.

Doesn’t take long for us to figure out that this is for people with a WHOLE lot more money than any of us will ever see. We are talking million-dollar floating palaces here.

So, we take our tiny little raggedy ass ole boats…and slip out of there as quietly and quickly as we can…and reverse course.

Once deneme bonus we clear the end of the island… we can easily see that THIS is where we need to be following the Niagara to the left. If we had continued on through the yacht club and continued on our way in that direction…we would have indeed got to see the Niagara Falls…up close and personal. Might have even made the top story on the national news! Headlines would have read “Four idiots try to “Evil Kinevil” over Niagara Falls in boats!”

We follow the river down through Buffalo, until we find a very large marina with a boat dealership nearby. Figure that we should probably have both boats checked for any Prop damage…before we try to tackle the great lakes. I didn’t hear our props hitting anything going through the canal…but I had read in several blogs that prop damage was a common occurrence…so, better safe than sorry.

We check with the dealership, and they assure us that they can check our boats tomorrow…but are already booked solid for today. So, we go to the Marina and rent a couple of transient slips for the night….which works to our advantage…as they have full services right there….we can hook up to electricity, fill our potable water tanks and pump out our wastewater tanks…right where we are berthed.

We all decide to walk around and explore once the boats are taken care of. Bob is so happy to find a McDonalds… across the road and down from the Marina! So, there was no need in even asking where she wants to eat our evening meal.

After we had finished eating…we continued our walk…and the girls both spot a Barber shop/Women’s hair salon at the same time.

“How long will it take for them to work on the boats” Ann asked

“Depends on how quick they can schedule them in the morning. Should not take too long…once they get to them. But if there are boats ahead of us…it might be midafternoon before they can look at them. Do you girls have something in mind that you want to do? We are not in THAT big of a hurry, that we cannot stick around for a while… if need be.

“Wash, set and cut our hair…that is ALL that we ask! Wouldn’t hurt if you mangey mongrels had your hair cut “PROFESSIONALLY either. This washing your hair with bar soap and whacking at it with scissors…just is not working guys!

“okay” I say ” Sign on the door says this place doesn’t open till 9 and says walk in’s welcome. I’ll go over to the dealership when it opens at 7 and see when they can get the boats in. I can take them both over there and leave them… so we can be back here when they open…and we can all get our hair done. How does that sound?”

“Awesome Possum!” shouts Bob

Max and I are both up early and wander over to the dealership. They tell us to bring both boats over and they will work them in as quickly as they can. Once we have that task completed, the girls are ready to break and run for the hair salon.

We were lucky that they were able to take all four of us at the same time. So, I told them that we wanted “The works” for everyone.

Have to admit…their way of giving a guy a shave, was much better than what I had been doing… which was “scraping the fur off with a lid off of a tuna can”…well maybe not THAT drastic…but that is how it felt some mornings!

Amazing how something as simple as getting a haircut can change a person’s whole outlook on life. We all leave the place feeling vibrant and refreshed. There is a little Deli just a short distance away. So, we all go in there for sandwiches before we walk back to the boat dealership.

The Boats are ready when we get there…and just as we had suspected they both needed new props. Like the guy said…they were not in terrible shape…but were showing enough signs of wear that we would be better off replacing them now…instead of out in the middle of a Lake somewhere. While we were at it…I went ahead and purchased extra props to have on hand…:”just in case”

We top off our fuel tanks, raise the antennae mast back up, on the Queen Ann and head out, through the Black Rock Lock and onto Lake Erie. We plan to stick fairly close to the shore on the “American side” of the lake until we reach Toledo Ohio…then up the Detroit River… across Lake St Claire then up the St Claire River to Lake Huron… then up the eastern coast of Michigan to the straits of Mackinac and onto Lake Michigan. We will cross Lake Michigan from Muskegon to Milwaukee Wisconsin, then travel south until we reach Chicago and begin our trek down towards the Mississippi.

From Buffalo Ny to Chicago Il., we are looking at 892 nautical miles. Even running full throttle, we have a long way to go before we can head south!

Because of our late start today…we only make it to Sturgeon Point before it gets dark. So, we decide to berth at the Marina there…and head out early tomorrow morning.

We get the boats taken care of…and find that there is a “hot dog stand” right there at the Marina….so we all get ourselves some dogs and sit down at a picnic table to enjoy them.

Just as Max was getting ready to take his first bite…. Bob says matter of factly ” You do realize that there is absolutely no “Macho” way to eat a hot dog, don’t you?”

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